Think. React. Disengage....

"grow up!" -gosh i've been hearing those words for far too long and as i can vaguely remember the last time i heard those words, i reacted. in a weird way of course! some would argue it was negative right down to hell but as far as i can remember, it was perfectly normal- just like what a normal 19 year old boy will do- induce a self-inebriation, metaphorically. back then, it was the best way out of it, the perfect way, the only way to avoid such statement that renders our ability to actually perform the irony itself, to run away, to simply hide behind the very simple fact that we're made to repel, to be rebellious and to oppose what we're told to do/not to do. after all, rules/orders were meant to be broken/disobeyed. as of this moment, im nearly 20 and wasted a great deal of my life and if i still have these thoughts in my mind right now, im going nowhere. so much for living credits and awesome high school reports! i've tried. and i'm exhausted beyond any living soul's tolerance. i understand the logics, i do. giving up aint doing any good, but thats just for starters. to me, giving up is merely like having a break while others fight their heart out. a break for us to redeem ourselves and learn our enemies weaknesses and an excuse for us to later take a jump at them and chew their necks off while we watch our comrades bleed to death and grin. thats what giving up to me means. a break! from the rat race. the rush. the global-im-there-you're-not-there-yet thing going on right now. to be perfectly honest, i dont really care coz no one should. whats the point of reaching there first when at the end of the day, we're all be there, regardless of how hard we tried, we fight our way there. its true that the end is not that important. but remember this, the journey isnt so important after all and in fact, its the start is the most important of it all. argue with me, we all have starts. we started off the same? wrong. we choose where we start. there's always a time where we make amends for someone we left out, we make resolutions, we plan ahead, we sacrifice a lil bit, but there's always a moment where we sit down, take a sip and let others do the work. now at that precise moment, at that blink of an eye, at that time, is our start. where everything else stops. because, giving up/having a break/chilling/disengaging is our start. start to end something so that we can start something new...a brand new end